Grief and Trauma

These are both great images of what trauma looks like. It binds you, all of you, holding you hostage, and makes everything in your mind and ways of thinking , not work or function correctly. I have recently had multiple events hit all at once. Multiple anniversaries of loved ones passing-I was finally feeling like I was handling that better, news of the pending divorce of a loved one, and multiple people passing. My ex brother in law passed, I have complex feeling about that. I lost a childhood friend's mother. I lost my 2nd spiritual mom, that has been devastating even though it was expected. My dad advised me his wife is leaving him, and I cannot stand the thought of him one day passing alone. I also have complex feelings about that.For the icing on the cake, my ex husband took his life. He was being accused of something I am one thousand percent sure he did, and to avoid incarceration, or being accountable and facing justice for his actions, he took his life instead. That last one, has absolutely gutted me. I read 2 wonderful posts recently I want to keep in front of me, and wanted to share with anyone who may come across this post. I pray it helps someone. By Patrick Weaver Hello Pain, My God you've consumed my mind, my life and my prayers. Lord knows we've been doing this dance for too long, and I know thaat I have to take some responsibility for the misery that comes from talking to you, listening to you , and agreeing with your beliefs that undermine my power, beauty and potential. I thought our commiserating was my way of grieving but now I know that you are compounding my grief, and our commiserating is causing my incarceration. I see you for what you are, I see that your purpose is to make me think something is wrong with me because of what happened to me. In 2024, I'm evicting you, I'm no longer going to allow you to live in my head rent free. I'm not going to let you isolate me, speak lies over me or make me burn down my emotional house to keep you warm. I'm going to surround myself with supportive warriors to help me fight for the next version of me, I'm going to invest in my joy, I'm going to water my mind with truth and instruction for healing, I'm going to start doing things that reinforce my value and my desire to live my blessed life. And yes, that means you will be evicted in 2024. Consider this your eviction notice. Don't bother coming back for your stuff, I burned up everything that belonged to you! Oh, and incaase you try to sneak back in, don't worry about the dog, I got my Sword back-and it's sharp! Heartprints of God For the one longing to pour out you heart to God, but you have no words. The sorrow-too much. The situation-too much. The magnitutde of the mess-too much. The cry of your heart too much for human words to articulate. Don't worry about the words. Simply bring your heart to God in the silence. In moments like these, when we are unable to pray, the Holy Spirit, Himself, prays for us. When we can't, when we don't know how, when we don't know what to pray-the Spirit can, the Spirit will, the Spirit does. All you need to do is bring your heart. He will bring the words, and His words don't return void.